Joe Can't Wait by Petra Michelle

 

BACKSTORY

Quarterback, JOE PENDLETON, is looking forward to leading his team to the Super Bowl but is involved in a terrible car collision with a truck. An over-anxious GUARDIAN ANGEL, on his first assignment, plucks Joe out of his body early, believing his death is imminent. Joe arrives in the afterlife.

Joe refuses to believe that his time is up. Upon investigation, the mysterious MR. JORDAN discovers that Joe's not destined to die until years later. Unfortunately, his body has already been cremated so a new body must be found.

FADE IN:

EXT./INT. HARD ROCK STADIUM. MIAMI, FLORIDA - DAY

Joe and Mr. Jordan stand unseen on the sidelines of a football game between the Miami Dolphins and the New York Jets.

JOE Ever since Dan Marino, all I ever wanted was to be a quarterback.

MR. JORDAN I remember him. The Man, right?

JOE I'm impressed, Mr. Jordan.

MR. JORDAN Look, Joe, you may get lucky, but I wouldn't count on it.

A Jets quarterback is tackled. 

JOE This is it!

He runs to the downed quarterback only to watch him rise and join his teammates. Joe GRUMBLES, watching the teams go head to head. The Dolphins' quarterback goes down.

JOE This is it!

Joe runs to the downed quarterback. Seconds later he rises, collects himself, and dashes towards his team; Joe exasperated.

This dance of quarterbacks falling and Joe running to enter their bodies repeats itself for the duration of the game. Aching and exhausted, he hobbles to Mr. Jordan, then collapses.

JOE Take me, God. I'm ready.

MR. JORDAN Don't worry, Joe, the next will be yours.

JOE I can't wait.

When the game ends, THOUSANDS rise and CHEER in exaltation, except one. 

MR. JORDAN There.

Following Mr. Jordan's glance at the CHEERLEADERS,

JOE Beautiful, but I can't move let alone make a pass.

MR. JORDAN The stretcher is nearing. Now, Joe, from here on, you won't remember anything that's happened. Good bye, Joe.

JOE So long and thanks.

As Joe disappears, a CHEERLEADER sits up. Examining her surroundings,

CHEERLEADER Where am I?

She climbs off and bumps into Mr. Jordan.

CHEERLEADER Pardon me.

Mr. Jordan stares at her.

CHEERLEADER Wasn't it the most exciting game ever?! I thought I fainted, but here I am!

MR. JORDAN Joe?

She looks around her quizzically. Clutching his arm,

CHEERLEADER C'mon, cupcake. Let's celebrate.

MR. JORDAN But can't you see I'm a man?

CHEERLEADER I'll say!

As he steps back,

MR. JORDAN Joe, I've got to go.

As he steps up his pace,

CHEERLEADER Where are you going?

As Mr. Jordan runs for the hills,

CHEERLEADER Stop! Please! The night's young!

Joe, er, the cheerleader on his heels.

FADE TO BLACK